I disagree with your stance on questions. First, as a woman I often have to be far more careful of how I say things than a man would--men HATE feeling criticized, and even more so by a woman. Therefore, I usually say "what was your motivation for doing this this way" vs. "this seems like a counterintuitive way to do this." And I find this has benefits such as I don't get into trouble when I'm genuinely wrong, which happens to everyone, or maybe they didn't even write that code, but it shows up as their change due to the way they merged or something.